Death spiral?

I remember a day at work shortly after I had finished chemo when my body’s core temperature dropped dramatically.  I was reduced to uncontrolled chills.  Co-workers managed to get me into a chair and began piling coats on me in an attempt to get my core temperature up.  Everyone was worried and wanted to call an ambulance.  Stubborn individual that I am I refused instead electing to call Marvina to come get me.

Once home she put me into a hot shower to bring my temperature up, then bundled me into bed with blankets.  I may have been nauseated too but I don’t remember that many details from it.  I only remember that it wasn’t fun.

So, the past few weeks have seen pain in my kidneys, predominantly my left, precisely where they found the cancer when it returned.  I’ve had back pain and I feel tired all the time.  Thinking back I’ve also been ever so slightly nauseated as well although so far I haven’t had to throw-up.

While I didn’t have any back or kidney pain today I was tired and nauseated.  After getting off work, after dinner, my core temperature dropped again.  This time I got to it fast and hopped into a hot shower.  So far so good.  I feel a bit better temperature wise but the rest still feels blah.

I also have pain in my left armpit.  I’d noticed a lymph node, I think, had swollen  up there a few weeks ago.  Feels like something there now.

I guess I’ll call my oncologist and tell him what’s going on.  This will likely trigger a CT or MRI.  I’m okay with that since it will answer if anything really wrong is going on cancer wise.

Of course, it could be my kidney disorder that’s rearing its ugly head.  If there’s no cancer I’ll have to make an appointment with my nephrologist and get that checked out.

All this makes me want to cry.  I don’t want to slip into sickness again.  I’m not sure I have the strength in me to fight it again.

Shit.